Pippy Mail Tuesdays!
Well humans and humanettes, Tuesday has finally arrived!
That's right, and we all know what Tuesday means!!
No? Well, that's because this Tuesday will be the first one of many for Pippy mail!
Due to the overwhelming response to the website, I have decided to answer a select few of the questions posed to me through email (by the way, it's pippystyle@gmail.com).
Here's how it works. Email me at pippystyle@gmail.com and provide the following:
Your Name
Your Location
Your Question
Your Picture (optional of course if you're really ugly)
Each Tuesday I'll select the best and most unique questions to be featured here! Each question will be unfiltered and unedited, and I promise a well thought out response will be given. You can ask me anything..... ANYTHING!!!
Now on to the emails... and remember, there is no such thing as a stupid question!
Question #1
Pippin the Almighty,
Do cats have hops?
Yours Truly,
Wood-Cock Johnson from Newark, New Jersey
I'm assuming by "hops" you are asking whether or not cats have a high vertical jump. Would I be correct in this assumption Mr. WCJ?
Well, rather than answer it, I will provide you with these ridiculously spectacular photos of myself in action, and let you answer the question yourself:
Question #2
Hey Pipmeister,
If you're really a cat, then how did you learn English?
Thanks,
Mr. Richard Phace from Fucking Tarsdorf, Austria
The same way you learned how to shave your ass.
I just did.
Also, I have gained a lot of my knowledge through picture books and google image search. By linking a series of symbols together, which you call letters, with a picture I was able to quickly pickup on your unnecessarily complex language.
Question #3
Hey Pippy,
Why do cats smell other cats behinds?
XOXO,
Simply Sally of Humansville, Missouri
HAHAHAHAAA.... It's butts not behinds! Learn to spell.
Well, Simple Sally, as I'm sure you're aware, the butt is home to a wide variety of smells. Take yours for example.
No, wait.... Gross.... Let's not use yours as an example. Let's use mine.
Similar to your butt Sally, my butt has anal glands. Each cat has a distinctive glandular discharge which is helpful distinguishing one cat from another. Because these glands are used in trail marking, we sniff this end first when coming across a new kitty. It's helpful, you see!
When we sniff your butt, it usually means we're trying to find where that dead raccoon is hiding.
Well that's it for the mail this week. Remember, send in your emails so you can be featured in next week's Pippy mail!
